Insecurities

In the back of all full time RV’ers mind lurks a quiet insecurity. It is a double-edged sword living this life. The freedom of not being tied to a piece of property or the burden of an empty house to maintain is liberating.  This week out of nowhere, I found myself longing for that kind of stability with all its burdens for the first time since we started this adventure nearly 4 years ago. We talked about it one evening and as we talked about the reality of going back to our old life, the weird feelings I had earlier in the day faded quickly, and I realized how normal this life is to me and my feelings of insecurity acutally led to a validation that this life is indeed what I am supposed to be doing. 

There is a certain insecurity in heading to a new job in a new area. Not knowing if we will like the work or if our employer will fulfill their end of the contract as stated. A natural disaster can displace a work camper and sometimes end an assignment leaving us in limbo.  In our first four seasons at this we have dealt with that dynamic three times. A Hurricane nearly nixed our winter job two years ago. Major flooding in Iowa displaced many of the workcampers twice that season, but the park was able to keep us onsite in other areas that were not flooded. We know people who have been displaced by wildfires in the west as well.  Things always worked out.  When a tornado is in the area, we certainly feel insecure, not being able to get underground.  All those things are short-lived, and options are always available to those who are willing to be flexible.

These insecurities are relatively easy to keep tamped down given the fact that assignments are easy to find, and campgrounds are everywhere you look these days. We take a lot for granted on the road. It never occurs to us that when we need something from the store on the road that the store may not have it in stock. It certainly never occurs to us that we won’t be able to find a place to stay on our route or be able to buy gas for the rig whenever we want to.

That all changed this past week. Panic is gripping the entire country. No one has been untouched by the impact of the latest virus. Fear and insecurity are the monster under everyone’s bed lately and no one can stop obsessing about it. The situation we are in today makes the 1,300- mile journey home seem like light years.

My rational mind feels confidant that we will drive away from the Rio Grande Valley in two weeks and get home without any issues. We have decided to caravan with friends here who are headed to the same destination. There is no plan, just a shaky faith that gas stations will have plenty of fuel for us and we will find a safe place to boondock the two nights that we will stop. Our original plan to take six days and visit friends and relatives on the way home is off the table. The name of the game is drive-sleep-drive-sleep and drive one more time. Our job at the Corps Park that we are going into our fourth season with is on hold indefinitely.

The only thing we know for sure today is that we have a reservation at home at a full-service RV park that we have patronized in the past through the third week of April. After that we hope to be able to get our summer season underway at Saylorville. If not, we will have to implement a yet to be determined Plan B.

We keep in touch with others who left before us and are encountering closed areas. I am grateful that we will not be on the road for two more weeks. I am grateful that I have a resourceful, mechanical, reliable husband to travel with. I can’t imagine the feeling of heading out into this strange new world on a solo journey. My thoughts are with those who are making the trip north this week. I work four more shifts at the RV Office and will keep myself sane completing the normal pre-flight checklist. One of the unknowns that is nagging at me most is whether I can buy paper plates to use on the road and restock my toilet paper supply before we leave. But, then no one knows when the illusive TP will reappear on the shelf at the store.

Until next time…